Just when I was about to give you another chance..

I read it over. She, with all her anger, with all her ego and I don't know what's on your mind. Just when I was about to give you another chance, to rebuild my trust, the same thing happens over and over again. Two days ago we're sitting on the same chair, sharing my thoughts, hoping you'll realize someday. Wishing that somewhere deep in your heart where the words of commitment once came, you know what's in my heart and you know what you're doing is even worse than him.

I almost believe you've realized it when I saw there was something different in the way you treat me yesterday, but I guess I'm hoping too much. It's all still the same. I don't know what you're planning. I don't know how things will go between us- you, me and her- coz it always be the same.

I'm tired. Say whatever you want to say, little girl. Do whatever you want to do with your ego. I don't care. Blame me for everything I don't even know. Publish everything I've done on your social networking, I don't care. The more you talk the more people know who you really are. One day you'll realize, you are not different than me. What makes us different are I keep my words, I'm not hiding, and I accept reality though it bites. I never want to run from reality. I face it.

I'm tired. Do whatever you want to do, my dear one. Keep her in your heart, I care no more. Stay in touch with her if it really makes you happy. Put me aside if you can never put her aside. I just want some piece of mind. I just want to heal my wound. I only want to cure all the scars you all've been given me. You know how much I love you, my dear one. You know how hard it is to fight for our dreams, but now, does it still really matter?

I have my dream, I keep it floating 5 cm in front of my fore head. I know everything will now be much easier after I get the job. I'll survive.